the relationship or the marriage. The couple is capable to survive the separation. It takes dedication and hard work to make the marriage or relationship work.
A long distance relationship among couples especially with a spouse who is in the military is sometimes difficult and maintaining the relationship or the marriage can be very straining. There are so many setbacks and hard times that are witnessed in the process of making such relationships work-out. It is not simple to maintain the long relationship. The couple misses the close touch that exists between the partners and sometimes they miss each other extremely. Such partners are obliged to work together and devise techniques and ways that will make the relationship stand the test of time (Bell and Brauer-Bell 62).
There are so many ways that the partners would feel close to their spouse despite thousand of miles between them. One of the ways to do so is to talk on the cell phones. Couples ought to take advantage of are plans by the cellular services where there are unlimited talk time especially in the evenings or during the weekends and also during holidays. Alternatively, the opportunity presented by social networks such as Facebook or even Myspace.com, may assisted military couples to maintain productive conversations on regular basis. Long-distance relationships require a bit of creativity as well as a sense of play if couples are to survive unhealthy criticism from friends or even relatives. As such spouses ought to avoid involving skeptic individuals when resolving their marriage issues as such parties will only aggravate the apparent problem for their personal gain.
Another way is by sending gift packages, perhaps more often. It is exciting to receive a specialty-packaged gift from spouses. There is always an attached meaning to a gift that is given by a lover. It helps to portray true love, care, concern and appreciation from such partners. Example of these gifts may include CD bearing a collection of best love songs, or even sending a collection of pictures that you have taken together, teddy bear or even a cute blanket, among others. These gifts help in drawing the memories of the perceived commitments that other partner has towards them. Refreshing such memories help in maintaining the relationship during unanticipated trying and challenging times (Guldner 136)
Long-distance may offer a good opportunity to the partners to develop individual-relationships which are deemed paramount in enhancing love and creativity in marriage-life (Bell and Brauer-Bell 20). For example, several months that an individual spends away from their partners can be more beneficial if the concerned spouses translate this moment into a positive-activity oriented session. It’s only through creativity and positive-self reflection that a long-distance relation works through trials and undying challenges. Such positive activities may involve a search for new hobby, artistic undertakings such as poetry or painting that can be used in communicating love messages to loved ones far away. In fact, such an undertaking offers an opportunity for individual growth in the relationship.
In arguments, the partners should understand that there will be no physical intimacy moment useful in erasing relationships pains. In this case, spouses ought to avoid defensive communication approaches such as being harsh, intimidating and rude as such moves create suspiciousness among partners. Individuals alleged of infidelity are always employ defensive communication skills. This is because the long distance communication is more valued or weighted more heavily than face-to- face communication. The partners should take advantage of the distance in cases where arguments arise and they both need time to think and rethink about the issue, and possibly table the discussion in later times for amicable resolutions. Finally, individuals with spouses working in the military can maintain their relationship by continually sharing basic ideas in loving building. Always sharing ideas and thoughts on how to move the relations ahead, is the key driving force that may see any long-distance relationship succeed. Keeping the signs of devotion and love fresh is a good way to ensure that the relationship is maintained (Tiger 168).
As evidenced by the above discussion, long-distance relationship among spouses can survive where the concerned parties portray concern, continued love/romance and productive sharing on all issues. Long distance relationships with spouses in the military are very manageable and can be maintained. There will be discouragements and hard times but when the two partners agree, and perhaps embrace acceptance on the entire situation love and trust will prevail. The perceived distance between partners only works to separate lover physically, but the enduring love is never changed. Premised on undying trust and love, the relationship is poised to survive hard as well as challenging moments.
- Bell, Chris and Brauer-Bell, Kate. The long-distance relationship survival guide: secrets and strategies from successful couples who have gone the distance. Berkeley, CA: Ten Speed Press, 2006.
- Guldner, Gregory. Long Distance Relationships: The Complete Guide. Corona, CA: JFMilne Publications, 2004.
- Tiger, Caroline. The Long-Distance relationship Guide. Philadelphia, PA: Quirk Books Publishers, 2007.